


Love Is Hard, I Know

by Semi_problematic



Category: Eyewitness (US TV)
Genre: Breakup Fic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-14
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-15 03:56:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11797887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Semi_problematic/pseuds/Semi_problematic
Summary: Changes can be scary, but not the scariest thing.





	Love Is Hard, I Know

Philip walked back and forth on his front porch, running his hands up and down his thighs in an effort to calm himself down. It was happening. He was going to do it. He was breaking up with Lukas. 

Okay, now, don't get him wrong, he loves Lukas more than anything and Lukas has made him the happiest he has ever been, but Philip had just got his acceptance letter for a college up in the city and Lukas already decided he wanted to travel around and do motocross. Philip didn't want to risk tearing everything they built up down for trying long distance. Lukas wasn't the cheating type, once everything was sorted out with Rose he had barely even talked about how attractive another guy was, but Philip didn't want to tie him down and make him suffer when they had to go days or maybe weeks without hearing each other's voice. It was only fair to let Lukas be free. He wanted him happy before anything else.

Lukas' motorcycle engine echoed through the small neighborhood as he sped down the road and turned into the driveway. He parked and pulled his helmet off, smiling wide as he waved at Philip before shutting off his motorcycle. He climbed off and hung his helmet on the handlebars before making his way up the lawn.

Philip already felt his chest starting to ache. It took him a long time but he started to see something everyone talked about. The way Lukas looks at Philip. The way his face softens and a smile forms on his lips. It only made everything harder. Philip didn't want that look to become someone elses but Philip didn't want that look to die down completely. He forced a smile and waved at Lukas.

Lukas stepped up on the front porch and wrapped his arms around Philip, kissing him gently. "Hey." He smiled. "What was so important? Did you miss me?" 

Philip opened his mouth to reply but stopped. He pulled away and fixed his shirt, stepping back a few feet. "I.. got accepted." 

Lukas' smile widened and he opened his arms, wrapping them around Philip. "Baby! That's great! I know how bad you wanted to get in! God, you're gonna do so good."

The guilt set in in that moment. He was breaking up with the person that supported him the most ever since his mom died. "Yeah.. I just.. want to talk to you about it."

Lukas nodded. "That's okay. You want help picking classes? Or moving into your dorm? You'll get a dorm you can't drive hours every day and-"

"I'm breaking up with you." Philip said quickly and quietly. 

Lukas froze, turning and looking at Philip. The brightness in his eyes was gone. "What?" 

"I'm breaking up with you."

"I heard you the first time." Lukas snapped. "But why? We've been doing so good. Our lives are starting."

"I can't do long distance, we could cheat or ruin our relationship with it." Philip explained. "If we stay together I'm holding you back."

"You've never held me back and I would never cheat. Giving up on us is ruining our relationship more than distance would." Lukas shot back.

"Lukas.. you'll be surrounded by hot guys.. and we spend every minute together. It'll be too hard."

Lukas scoffed. "Too hard on you, you'll probably cheat on me."

Philip frowned. "I didn't say that."

"But you think I will."

"No, I think we'll be happier apart."

Lukas leaned on the railing of the front porch, wrapping his hands tightly around it. "Fine."

Philip was almost heartbroken that Lukas didn't try to fight back, then again, even if Lukas did it would be over. Philip wasn't going to ruin what they had, he wanted his last memories with Lukas to be good. "We can still be friends, you are my best friend."

"So thats just it?" Lukas whispered. "You're just gonna break up with me after a year and a half of being together and you tell me to be your friend? Do you know how painful this is for me?" He turned to look at Philip, tears in his eyes.

"No one said I wasn't upset about this." Philip replied. "You know I care you."

"Then why can't you stay with me?"

"I don't want to ruin it!" Philip yelled.

Lukas stood up straight and walked off of the front porch, his shoulder hitting Philips as he walked. "You already did." 

Philip was about to yell, about to scream sorry and run after Lukas, but he didn't. Why try and fix something when it's already broken? When it's already over? He had to admit part of him was thankful, now he can't hurt Lukas anymore.

Weeks passed. Philip tried his hardest to text and talk to Lukas and time was running out. Graduation was only three days away and Lukas had ignored every single one of his texts. Philip didn't want to ruin what they had, he didn't want to tear it down like the distance would have, he wanted their last memories to be happy and loving, not angry and lonely. 

Philip was laying in his bed when someone knocked on their door. He figured it was one of the neighbors, they always came by asking Helen and Gabe stuff and just visiting. Tivoli was like a odd small family, minus the stupid people that spent all their time gossiping as pinning other people on each other. 

Helen pulled the door open and frowned. "Bo?"

"Helen." Bo took his had off and ran his fingers across his head. "Is Philip home?"

"Yeah.. why?"

"Lukas.. he hasn't been talking.. much, it's like his mom died all over again. He only goes to school and comes home and goes to races. He doesn't even practice anymore." Bo explained. "And if I'm understanding everything, Philip dumped Lukas."

Helen put her hands up. "I don't know what happened, all I know is that I'm not supposed to let Lukas in the house if he has flowers or chocolates." 

Bo raised an eyebrow. "Well.. um.." He cleared his throat. "Lukas has none of that.. do you think they could talk?"

Helen smirked. "Are you playing match maker?"

If looks could kill Helen would've been dead. "No, I'm not playing anything. I love my son and my son loves your boy and he hasn't been the same without him. And if I have to force them to talk I will."

"I'll bring Philip down but.. why is this such a big deal?"

"Lukas is acting the way I did when Sally broke up with me. I know I'm not the biggest ally or whatever but I know what love looks like and what they have is love." Bo ranted. "And if I know anything about love I know that you can't stop it, no matter what." Bo pulled his hat back on. "Now go get your son." He turned around and walked down the yard. He flung open the passenger door and pulled Lukas out by the arm, nearly dragging him up the lawn.

Helen walked up the stairs and knocked on Philips door softly. She wished Gabe was there to help, he was better with all these feelings and romance. He would know how to get Philip out of bed without even having to mention Lukas.

"What?" Philip called from behind the door.

"I need you to come downstairs." Helen replied. "It'll only take a few minutes."

"Fine." Philip climbed out of bed and pulled on a shirt, running his fingers through his hair to make sure it all laid down. He walked out and flashed a small smile at Helen.

They walked down the steps, turning down the corner and walking towards the front door. Lukas was leaning against the railing while Bo sat on one of the chairs next to the door. Philip went to turn around but Helen pushed him forward. Once Philip stepped out of house Helen followed and shut the door.

"You guys.. talk." Helen mumbled. "Bo and I will go stand.. over there."

"He doesn't want to talk." Lukas mumbled.

"I've been texting you." Philip whispered. "You're the one ignoring me."

"I think we should go." Helen nudged Bo and they walked off, walking down to the driveway and starting to talk.

"Sorry but it's hard to talk to someone who ripped your heart out because they don't want to try." Lukas grumbled, crossing his arms.

"Are you seriously telling me it's because I don't want to try?"

"Yeah. It is. I wanted to stay but you're so worried about us breaking up because long distance is hard." Lukas looked up, his hair covering his eyes slightly. "You know what's hard? Being in love with someone and them leaving you. You know what's worse? Having to live and keep going on when everything reminds you of the person you love!"

Philip was silent for a moment. "You love me?"

"Are you really that surprised? Philip, I took photography just so I would know what you were talking about. I tell everyone about you all the time. I'm not just some proud gay guy, I'm in love with you."

"I'm in love with you, too." Philip mumbled, stepping closer. 

Lukas smiled a little and it was the most beautiful thing Philip had seen in weeks. "I would hope so.. or else this would be awkward."

Philip pressed his forehead to Lukas'. "I was scared.. I didn't want our relationship to end bad of distance and then hate you for the rest of my life.. and I didn't want to hurt you."

Lukas took Philips hands and played with them, looking down at him. "If we can get through a triple homicide I think we can handle long distance. Don't you?" Lukas kissed each of Philips fingers.

Philip nodded. "You have a point."

"So are we together again? Or do I have to tell you I love you again?"

"We are but I want you to say it again." Philip was smiling widely now. 

"I love you." Lukas whispered.

"And I love you." Philip replied.

Helen and Bo stood down by the cars, watching.

"It looks like they made up." Helen muttered. "Our work here is done."

Bo nodded. "You're right.. uh.. thanks for bringing Philip down."

"Why?"

"Because Lukas hasn't been this happy since before his mom died.. Philip brings out the good in him."

"I think Philip brings out the good in everyone."


End file.
